Month: September 2013

Reflection

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After changing to fit into society, you are eventually going to want your old self back sooner or later.

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Weekend Summary

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So on Friday evening, we had a shower together, and I asked him to dress up goth – he has a lovely little latex/lace mix dress.. here’s a pic of what it looks like:

Of course it looks MUCH better on him.  He wore his red heels as well, which added a slutty feel to the outfit, he looked totally delicious, I wanted to devour him there and then, instead I took satisfaction walking behind him as he climbed up the stairs.  We sat down on the sofa and I spent a while doing his hair and makeup.  I paled his skin, gave him dark eyeliner, eyeshadow and mascara.  He ended up looking like a sexy little goth slut.   I took some pictures, we got pretty stoned and my predatory instincts took over.  

I told him to imagine he was in a room full of people, and I started molesting him, but if he made a noise or movement, they might notice and that would make him blush.  I always fantasised that I might play with him in front of a large group of people and at that moment, I was able to visualise what it might feel like.  I could feel his cheeks reddening as I increased the pleasure, I used my hands and vibrator and also sucked and licked  him.  I could see he was struggling to keep control of his body, he had gone completely rigid from head to toe.  He kept quiet and still.  I looked at him feeling pride that he has such amazing self control.  I told him he could release and allowed him to cum, after much teasing.

On Saturday, we got way too stoned, and ended up just having some lazy pleasure in bed together.  

On Sunday morning, I woke up, full of energy…. I started playing with him while he was half asleep and sucking on his ear.  I wanted to watch him cum.  He lay there on his back while I played with him, I monitored his reaction to each stroke and he came when I told him to.  

Much to my surprise (and delight!) he was horny that evening again and after our shower he’d put on a pretty pink silky nightie and we were sitting talking about random things – some BDSM related topics and he started touching me.  I grinned at him and asked what his intentions were.  He told me that he wanted to make me feel good.  I let him continue and he attempted to distract me during conversation – and succeeded a few times!  He’s so good with his hands… but I wanted more this evening.  I decided that I wanted to use him instead.  I teased him a little with the vibrator and then sat on his cock and fucked him until I got myself off.  He did well not to cum and I rewarded him by using the vibrator underneath his nightie until he came.  He’s such a perfect little slut.

Question Time: How did you meet your sub?

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I run an online gaming community – we play lots of different games together. We were playing one particular MMORPG and this guy joined my guild – was a mate of someone already in the guild so we let him in. I fell in love with his voice almost immediately, he was fun, intelligent, passionate, quirky and (when i saw a picture of him) very sexy.  He liked to talk a lot.  I found him incredibly interesting on all levels.

We talked a lot after raids, I made him an officer he ended up running the raids alongside me… after a couple of months of talking to each other one-on-one, things got kinda sexual, we flirted with each other a lot, although we were both already in relationships at the time. My relationship was open, so I didn’t feel any guilt, his wasn’t though. He told me that he thought we should stop and he wanted to try and work things out with his girlfriend because he still loved her.

I was devastated, heartbroken. To get back at him, I played around with nearly every other male guild member. I talked to him about the guys I was with.  I can be a bit of a bitch like that. I think it kinda got to him after a while because he started talking to me again, in the way he used to. I was still angry with him at hurting me in the past, but I got over it.

He told me he liked to dress up in ladies clothes, I found that super hot. We planned some things that he might wear for me on cam… we talked more and more. Our own relationships IRL were deteriorating at that time. I ended up breaking up with my boyfriend at that time, for a whole host of reasons.. He broke up with his girlfriend, they hadn’t even slept in the same room in months.

He came over to Ireland to visit me. I’ll never forget the first day he showed up at my door, rucksack in hand, looking all shy and delicious. I pounced on him as soon as he got inside. We explored each others sexuality. He told me he was submissive, which worked out perfectly for me being of a dominant nature… we discovered that we were interested in a LOT of the same things sexually, as well as having the same life goals and outlook on life.

He visited a few more times, and I asked if he’d like to move in with me. We got our own place, he got a job here and are now in the process of living happily ever after.

I asked him to answer the same question.  Here was his response:

i would probably write something about how i met you through an online community i joined
kindled a friendship with you over a year or so
showed you my penis
then moved to ireland

I like his version better… 🙂

In answer to: http://www.reddit.com/r/BDSMcommunity/comments/1n47q1/how_did_you_meet_your_sub/

Addressing my fears

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We had a smoke and watched like 3 episodes of Star Trek and then a film.  Ambled down to bed at about 11:30.  Didn’t bother putting music on, it wasn’t necessary.  We were both pretty stoned.  He was wearing a little silky black nightdress, very short, no panties.  

I sat him up on the bed and put him between my legs facing away from me, so that I was holding him, from behind.  I held him close for a while, feeling his heartbeat, stroking his chest, touching his nipples and arms and thighs.  He was receptive and it was easy to arouse him by rubbing his cock through the silky nightdress.  So that’s what I did, I told him to open his legs up for me, I put my arm around his neck and choked him gently as I forced him into orgasm.  

I held my arm around his neck tightly as he released and his body shuddered under the pressure I was putting on him.  He came a lot.  It made me happy to see him satisfied and he looked all cute and his big subby blue eyes in his little black dress all covered in cum.  I smiled down at him.

I asked if he’d like to go upstairs for a smoke (cigarette) before sleeping and he agreed.  I went into the bathroom, I was soaking, aching to be touched.  Why didn’t I say something before we went up?  I felt a little silly.  I changed into some clean panties and went upstairs.  As I walked up, he was sitting on the couch reading his pad.  Shyly, I said “Sorry I took so long, had to change my pants, I was soaking”.  He didn’t look up.  I felt a little annoyed.  Maybe he didn’t hear.  I asked if he heard me? He told me that he did and apologised for not responding.

When we got downstairs a bit, it was still in the back of my mind.  Might have been a case of acute paranoia, but I felt a little hurt.  I lay there for a long time wondering why.  The previous night, as you read, I got a fantastic orgasm, but… being the nypmpho that I am, my body always wants more.  I told him that it was hard for me to get to that level of arousal and then not orgasm.  He apologised profusely and then got annoyed with himself for not making me cum or not “reading the signs”.

 It was my fault though, as my fury settled, I saw a little more clearly and apologised to him “Don’t let it ruin our fantastic evening, I should have communicated my needs better”.  I should have, said something.  I’m the domme here?! But sometimes, I feel a little greedy.  He only orgasms once every couple of days.  Sometimes I feel like too much maintenance needing one almost every day.  I’m always afraid of doing what I have to my previous partners, even though he’s absolutely NOTHING like them – that is, overwhelming him with attention and sex.

In the end, I played with myself while he rambled on for a bit.  When he finally noticed, he took over and gave me another amazing orgasm.

I feel so silly sometimes.

Sensual Massage

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I had a pretty crappy day yesterday.  One of those days where time stood still and I thought work was never going to end.  I dreamt that I was at work the night before, and then spent 8 hours at work…  I got home a little worse for wear and flopped into bed almost immediately.  My submissive, who arrives home from work about an hour after me, crawled into bed beside me, naked and lay there with me for a bit.  We  cuddled and I stroked his beautiful naked body, which always makes me feel better.

After the usual routine of dinner (stuffed ribs, gravy and mashed potatoes/carrots), star trek (watching through the voyager series at the moment because he hasn’t seen it) and shower (gave him a good old scrubbing), he asked if I’d like to join him in bed.  

I found some nice lounge jazz as background music which was perfect for the mood I was in – chaotic, but relaxed.  I removed my dressing gown and lay on the bed, face down on my belly and he began to massage my back.  I lay there, with my eyes closed, feeling his little fingers touching me, caressing me, he focused on my back and swept his fingers over my erogenous zones – spent a bit of time on the back of my neck.  He was so gentle, not like other people who’ve given me massages where I’ve often felt worse afterwards.

He kissed my neck and proceeded to massage my inner thighs and the surrounding area, my body responded appropriately and my back arched revealing more of myself to him.  I spent most of the time looking at him, watching him work, watching him please me, a grin on my face.  He was smiling too, he looked happy that I was enjoying myself, I closed my eyes and spread my legs a little further apart, inviting him to rub me.  He obliged and began to rub my clit with his finger, it felt amazing and I could feel my body responding to him.  

He went inside me with his fingers and began rubbing me again, this time with his whole hand.  I was soaking.  I closed my eyes and lay there, enjoying the sensation, enjoying his attentions.  My orgasm hit hard, my body shook with convulsions as a wave of pleasure hit every single blood vessel.  He continued, and I tightened my thighs around him, telling him to stop.  I couldn’t take any more.  I lay there for a while, shivering with pleasure, contented, happy, satisfied.  I love this man. 

Black Cat

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cauda-pavonis:

trapkitten:

woodelf68:

Black Floofball with eyes.

Soot sprite

always reblog this cat.

Financial Domination – the cancer of the BDSM world

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In BDSM, financial domination is a situation where a female dominant has complete control over the disposable income of Her submissive slave. For her instant gratification, she would also expect gifts whenever she felt like it.  

I’m seeing more and more of these “dominant women” pop up on fetlife.  There seems to be about 1000 of them for every 1 male into the fetish.  While there are some people genuinely interested in this kink, I believe that quite a large portion of the “findommes” that we’re seeing on kink sites are simply ladies (and some men) wanting to “cash in” for very little effort.  Frankly, if someone offered me cash for a few dirty pictures, I’d tell them to get stuffed. I am an independent woman capable of funding my own interests with money that I earn by working. That’s maybe because I’m not into this particular kink, either way, I like to pay my own way in life.

I mean if you think about it.  If you’re halfway attractive, sometimes even if you’re not, and you’re wanting to make a quick buck or get a few nice amazon gift cards – what better way to do it?  Take a few pics, make a naughty video or two and demand that people pay to see it, to satisfy their kink.  These people don’t give a flying fuck about the people whose lives they’re destroying.  That’s what annoys me.  Fetlife “femdom” boards and other male submissive boards are starting to litter with posts like this:

Tribute. Worship. Obey

As my cash slut Id treat you like the filthy rich human atm that you are. I’d love for you to take out that big fat wallet for me to grab with pleasure. As I humiliate your little dick , I’ll be raping you of your funds..weakening you ..controlling you. I’d fuck you financially so good, you’ll be begging for me to take and take just so your little bitch self can cum 😉

Another one..this person obviously needs to go back to high school, I can see why they’re suffering financially….

come in and serve me,pay ur fees slave boy

i looking for a slave boy,one very obedient,who can serve me,and tribute me by paypal,or amazon gift cards!i am free for cam sessions on skype or yahoo!inbox me for !have ready ur fees also!

We’re not just talking about the odd few posts, literally hundreds of them from men and women from all walks of life hoping to cash in on the latest craze.  I just wonder how many people will be left bankrupt as others walk away with their money.  OK, I realise that it’s pretty stupid of people just to give away their cash to random people online in exchange for a few pics or dirty words… porn is cheaper than that.  But often these people are broken and/or vulnerable which leads them down this path of despair.  Some even get addicted (see my links at the end of this post) and lose their entire life savings to these cancerous beings giving every other dominant individual on the planet a bad name.

One “findomme” asked on Fetlife:

How far can you push your self to please your FinDom? I mean… Bankrupcy?
Or maybe is too far away from you?

Another answered:

It’s one of my all-time fantasies to completely ruin and destroy a slave. Bankruptcy, the works. I am interviewing one candidate at the moment but I’m not sure just how serious he is. If he does go through with this I will make him regret it.

Now I’m all for getting my kink on.  But I do it in a way that doesn’t ruin anyone’s life.  Even if it is consensual, do these people are not concerned about the welfare of their “cash pigs” before emptying their wallet.  Peoples lives are genuinely being destroyed every day because of this.  There has to be limits put in place by the people doing this.  Shit like this gives the BDSM community a bad name.

Even the BDSM community is starting to recognise this, a recent post in Fetlife (excuse the terrible English, this is not my writing, it’s another post by a “Findomme”): 

I know I made a discussion before defendinh financial domination but damn its hard to persuade people when you have these fake ass bitches passing themselves off as findommes. Let me make this clear you ARE NOT a findomme if you have nothing going for you. If you’re not in college and actually passing not just scraping by or if you don’t have a job where you can support yourself then you are not a findomme. I’ve been on groups that are suppose to be catered to pig atms etc. Just to see pathectic fake findommes asking no I take that back begging to have their bills paid. And let me add if you’re a sub/slave who gives into this shit you’re a dumb motherfucker who deserves to be scammed b/c trust a findomme isn’t going to beg you they really don’t need you to buy anything for them to prosper in life. As a findomme and domme I can tell you any money I do receive doesn’t go towards my bills or rent it goes to miscellaneous things such as clothes shoes a new tv etc. And most of the time I make my pigs buy off my wishlist b/c it’s just a waste of time and take the thrill from financial domination just recieving cash all the time.

But how do you tell the difference between someone genuinely interested in the fetish and someone who isn’t?  Do these people set any kind of limits on themselves, i.e. , take a little bit, but not too much.  Like, my limits, when I’m beating my submissive is to not do any real long-term physical damage to his body.  Since financial domination is purely psychological – shouldn’t they sit limits on how much “damage” they do to a persons life?

An interesting point raised in another article:

A financial slave only works and earns so that he can please his adored dominant female. This means that he supplies constant financial support to Her and that he pays instant monetary penalties whenever She demands them. A key part of financial domination is the slave’s acceptance that he should only live on the cheapest groceries available so that his Goddess can enjoy more luxuries at his expense. To permit his domme to live like the Goddess that he knows She is, a good slave will make any sacrifice and – more importantly – take huge fetishistic pleasure in doing so. He expects nothing in return except the continued honour of serving Her.

When viewed in these terms it seems as though the domme has complete financial control but – in reality – the scenario is much more complicated. I am convinced that, in any situation, the customer is always right. The person with the money is the one with the real power in a BDSM relationship as in any other. This conclusion is at odds with the accepted definition of financial domination.

There is no such thing as a free lunch and a domme understands this all too well. The world of BDSM does not have a trade union or social security and a good domme – even a great one – has to maintain Her charm at all times to ensure Her continued value to Her slave and all of those subsequent treats and envelopes of cash.

So who is really the slave here?

References:

http://venusohara.org/the-myths-of-financial-domination.html

http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Am-Addicted-To-Financial-Domination/1064302

http://slaverichard.livejournal.com/

https://fetlife.com/groups/16482