Domme Questions: How do I ‘talk down’ to my sub?

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How do I ‘talk down’ to my sub? I’m not sure what to say and don’t want to repeat myself.

This particular thing is new to me but my sub mentioned he wanted me to “talk down to him” today.

I kinda drew a blank.

Sure, I called him a slut & whore and told him I owned him and stuff but it felt repetitive.

What else can I say?

Taken from Reddit.


My Response: 

Some methods I use on my submissive are to talk through the situation that I have him in at that moment “so I have you all tied up like my filthy little whore. I see you struggling against your binds but they won’t budge, your pathetic little attempts to escape won’t work, I’ve tied you down good”.. that kind of thing… just, describe what you’re doing to him at that time.

Then I usually move on to describe what I intend to do to him, which usually triggers a vocal response of some kind either in the form of words, a whimper or moaning. I say things like “I’m going to use your cock now to get myself off, don’t you dare fucking cum”. When I’m doing this, sometimes I have him blindfolded, sometimes I have him gagged, sometimes I’m holding his neck/throat from behind with my arm and whispering it in his ear.

The point is – It doesn’t all have to be about what you say (simply describing a situation is easy to do, and it helps put you in the mood as well), but also the way you say it and the position you have him in, if he can respond or not (is he gagged? does he have a dildo in his throat?). I much prefer my submissive to be unable to respond, this renders him feeling even more helpless. I also like it when he drools on himself… You might feel differently.

I dress my submissive up in sexy clothing too, I tell him that I’m going to rub his little clit, that drives him pretty crazy… it’s all about knowing what he enjoys and playing on that… your partner might not enjoy being feminised… but he will have triggers that you need to decipher… and work around that.

If you’re struggling with not knowing what to say, you can initiate some back-chat, for example – doing something on his body, whether it be a stimulus or an act of pain, and asking him to describe exactly how he feels. If his answer is adequate, you can smile at him and call him names. If he struggles to answer because he is being over-stimulated or in a lot of pain, then you can raise your voice and tell him that his answer was insufficient “that’s not good enough, tell me”…”i didn’t hear you past the pathetic whimpering”… as well as that, you can also issue him with commands, things like: sit up straight, spread your legs, bend over, a little more…. anyway, you get the point, that’s just a few of examples of methods that I use on my submissive.


If you have any other suggestions, feel free to answer… 🙂

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