A few have you have sent in some questions over the past couple of months that I finally got around to asking my sub. Here they are together with his answers.
1. What first attracted you to femdom?
I found a book discarded by a bus stop when I was younger. Being quite the bookworm, I read it on the bus, and I guess the seeds of alternative lifestyles comes from there. That was my first experience with a lot of things, and I think is probably the root of some of my fetishes. The book was penny in harness by penny birch. The cover attracted me because of the latex, and I enjoyed the book. I’m not really into dressing like a horse, but I guess we all refine our tastes over time!
2. What kind of d/s experience do you have prior to your current relationship?
It just kind of creeps up on you I guess. As I get older I learn more about how I feel about stuff and what I like to do so it’s constantly evolving. I had a few experiences with older, more dominant women than I was used to, and enjoyed it a lot more than the girls around my age I dated when I was a teenager. I thought it was a maturity thing, but looking back I probably enjoyed it more due to the dynamic.
Confident, strong women are much more attractive for me. I guess I have always got a kick out of my partner being in charge, it just sits naturally with me. I had a few relationships when I was younger where, as the male I was expected to be the dominant half and there are a lot of situations I can recall where I was just uncomfortable or unsure or just thinking ‘this should be the other way around’. I still made a few wrong turns on that front, but it lead me to where I am today, and I wouldn’t change that for anything. Meeting my partner changed my life for the better in more ways than I could recap here.
3. What’s your favourite kind of play?
Fave play I flutter through different moods a lot, so it varies a lot. Generally though I’d say my favourite type of play is sensual, involving lots of teasing and intimacy. I like dressing up , it makes me feel more confident and attractive, and I like to feel involved. A middle ground between being someone’s toy and being a test subject.
I am your Domme and I take my job very, very seriously. I spend a lot of time getting to know who you are, what you’ve gone through in your life, what your submission looks like… and, what it doesn’t. I need to know not just what all your boundaries are, but why you have them. I want to poke around in all the dark corners of your brain, and see what you have hiding back there, behind all of the cobwebs. I want to look at all of your carefully constructed walls and then take them apart, piece by agonizing piece. I want raw, brutal, unfiltered honesty. I want to see the you that you don’t show the rest of the world. I want to push your limits and show you that you are much more than you think you are… that you are capable of more, that you can give me more.
When we are “playing”, I am not catering to an audience. I don’t see, hear, smell or taste anyone but you, in those moments. Sometimes, I will take more than you were willing to give. Sometimes, there will be demands made of you that you don’t think you’re capable of meeting. I want to leave you shaken, torn, emptied… and then slowly put the pieces back. Not where you had them, but where I want them to be, because they are my pieces, now. I want you to be satisfied with your experiences. I want you to glow inside, knowing that you are mine and mine alone.
There is an overwhelmingly violent attraction to your vulnerability. It makes me lick my teeth and eye you like my last meal. It makes me want to both devour you and nurture you. It’s a terrible duplicity that leaves me vulnerable, too.
Intimacy colours everything. I am completely and utterly in love with you and while sometimes, it’s terrifying, it’s completely worth it. I can barely remember what my life was like before I met you. What I was like. I feel like me now.
I very much enjoy the softer, more sensual play lately, as I’ve gotten to know you over the past year. It’s something I like to dabble in more and more frequently. Using and teasing your body, moulding and shaping you into what I want. It’s almost an art form. I think there is merit in it… in playing to someone’s sexuality, in surprising them with moments of intense pain instead of overwhelming them with it… in handfuls of hair and dark whispers. I enjoy nothing more than watching you writhe and squirm and moan. I love knowing that I’m responsible for your extacy, your loss of control.
I smile and add it to the list of things I enjoy doing with you. It’s a surprising revelation to me. I am not soft and gentle. I’ve never been described as that. I’ve been described as intimidating, but never gentle. We’ve grown together, you and I.
Aggressive, relentless rush
Gentle, graceful shudder
A poem written to describe the amazing orgasm my submissive gave me last night.
His little hungry fingers caressed my body. He always knows the right places to touch. I was upset. He always makes it better. We made love in the darkness, his body writhing on top of mine, it was bliss. I felt my nails sink into his back as he moved his hips. I matched his motion and pulled him closer. A thin sheen of sweat on his delicate skin. I was drowning in bliss, it would have been enough for anyone but I wanted more, I wanted him to feel it too. My body shuddered a second time and he felt it too.
This beautiful little person was built just for me. He said something that made me smile “I like that it doesn’t always have to be you tying me up, sometimes it can just be us enjoying each other’s bodies”. He’s right.
I’m still smiling.
Quote Posted on Updated on
I Like My Body When It Is With Your
i like my body when it is with your
body. It is so quite new a thing.
Muscles better and nerves more.
i like your body. i like what it does,
i like its hows. i like to feel the spine
of your body and its bones,and the trembling
-firm-smooth ness and which i will
again and again and again
kiss, i like kissing this and that of you,
i like, slowly stroking the,shocking fuzz
of your electric furr,and what-is-it comes
over parting flesh….And eyes big love-crumbs,
and possibly i like the thrill
of under me you so quite new
E. E. Cummings (1894 – 1962)