financial domination

Financial Domination – the cancer of the BDSM world

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In BDSM, financial domination is a situation where a female dominant has complete control over the disposable income of Her submissive slave. For her instant gratification, she would also expect gifts whenever she felt like it.  

I’m seeing more and more of these “dominant women” pop up on fetlife.  There seems to be about 1000 of them for every 1 male into the fetish.  While there are some people genuinely interested in this kink, I believe that quite a large portion of the “findommes” that we’re seeing on kink sites are simply ladies (and some men) wanting to “cash in” for very little effort.  Frankly, if someone offered me cash for a few dirty pictures, I’d tell them to get stuffed. I am an independent woman capable of funding my own interests with money that I earn by working. That’s maybe because I’m not into this particular kink, either way, I like to pay my own way in life.

I mean if you think about it.  If you’re halfway attractive, sometimes even if you’re not, and you’re wanting to make a quick buck or get a few nice amazon gift cards – what better way to do it?  Take a few pics, make a naughty video or two and demand that people pay to see it, to satisfy their kink.  These people don’t give a flying fuck about the people whose lives they’re destroying.  That’s what annoys me.  Fetlife “femdom” boards and other male submissive boards are starting to litter with posts like this:

Tribute. Worship. Obey

As my cash slut Id treat you like the filthy rich human atm that you are. I’d love for you to take out that big fat wallet for me to grab with pleasure. As I humiliate your little dick , I’ll be raping you of your funds..weakening you ..controlling you. I’d fuck you financially so good, you’ll be begging for me to take and take just so your little bitch self can cum 😉

Another one..this person obviously needs to go back to high school, I can see why they’re suffering financially….

come in and serve me,pay ur fees slave boy

i looking for a slave boy,one very obedient,who can serve me,and tribute me by paypal,or amazon gift cards!i am free for cam sessions on skype or yahoo!inbox me for !have ready ur fees also!

We’re not just talking about the odd few posts, literally hundreds of them from men and women from all walks of life hoping to cash in on the latest craze.  I just wonder how many people will be left bankrupt as others walk away with their money.  OK, I realise that it’s pretty stupid of people just to give away their cash to random people online in exchange for a few pics or dirty words… porn is cheaper than that.  But often these people are broken and/or vulnerable which leads them down this path of despair.  Some even get addicted (see my links at the end of this post) and lose their entire life savings to these cancerous beings giving every other dominant individual on the planet a bad name.

One “findomme” asked on Fetlife:

How far can you push your self to please your FinDom? I mean… Bankrupcy?
Or maybe is too far away from you?

Another answered:

It’s one of my all-time fantasies to completely ruin and destroy a slave. Bankruptcy, the works. I am interviewing one candidate at the moment but I’m not sure just how serious he is. If he does go through with this I will make him regret it.

Now I’m all for getting my kink on.  But I do it in a way that doesn’t ruin anyone’s life.  Even if it is consensual, do these people are not concerned about the welfare of their “cash pigs” before emptying their wallet.  Peoples lives are genuinely being destroyed every day because of this.  There has to be limits put in place by the people doing this.  Shit like this gives the BDSM community a bad name.

Even the BDSM community is starting to recognise this, a recent post in Fetlife (excuse the terrible English, this is not my writing, it’s another post by a “Findomme”): 

I know I made a discussion before defendinh financial domination but damn its hard to persuade people when you have these fake ass bitches passing themselves off as findommes. Let me make this clear you ARE NOT a findomme if you have nothing going for you. If you’re not in college and actually passing not just scraping by or if you don’t have a job where you can support yourself then you are not a findomme. I’ve been on groups that are suppose to be catered to pig atms etc. Just to see pathectic fake findommes asking no I take that back begging to have their bills paid. And let me add if you’re a sub/slave who gives into this shit you’re a dumb motherfucker who deserves to be scammed b/c trust a findomme isn’t going to beg you they really don’t need you to buy anything for them to prosper in life. As a findomme and domme I can tell you any money I do receive doesn’t go towards my bills or rent it goes to miscellaneous things such as clothes shoes a new tv etc. And most of the time I make my pigs buy off my wishlist b/c it’s just a waste of time and take the thrill from financial domination just recieving cash all the time.

But how do you tell the difference between someone genuinely interested in the fetish and someone who isn’t?  Do these people set any kind of limits on themselves, i.e. , take a little bit, but not too much.  Like, my limits, when I’m beating my submissive is to not do any real long-term physical damage to his body.  Since financial domination is purely psychological – shouldn’t they sit limits on how much “damage” they do to a persons life?

An interesting point raised in another article:

A financial slave only works and earns so that he can please his adored dominant female. This means that he supplies constant financial support to Her and that he pays instant monetary penalties whenever She demands them. A key part of financial domination is the slave’s acceptance that he should only live on the cheapest groceries available so that his Goddess can enjoy more luxuries at his expense. To permit his domme to live like the Goddess that he knows She is, a good slave will make any sacrifice and – more importantly – take huge fetishistic pleasure in doing so. He expects nothing in return except the continued honour of serving Her.

When viewed in these terms it seems as though the domme has complete financial control but – in reality – the scenario is much more complicated. I am convinced that, in any situation, the customer is always right. The person with the money is the one with the real power in a BDSM relationship as in any other. This conclusion is at odds with the accepted definition of financial domination.

There is no such thing as a free lunch and a domme understands this all too well. The world of BDSM does not have a trade union or social security and a good domme – even a great one – has to maintain Her charm at all times to ensure Her continued value to Her slave and all of those subsequent treats and envelopes of cash.

So who is really the slave here?