crossdressing

Lethargy?

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I’ve been feeling a bit emotionally fragile the past few days.  I’m not really sure why.  I’ve been getting enough early nights, having enough rest and chill time and eating ok.  Work has been good.  I’ve been having nice evenings of games, tv and cuddles.

We went to see DevilDriver on Monday night.  I actually preferred their support band – Sylosis, who were fucking awesome.  It was an ok gig, we didn’t get to stand as close as I’d have liked but there were too many crazies to stand any closer.  After that we went back to the hotel and passed out almost immediately.  Hangover came swiftly the next day and we spent most of the day zombified.

We made love on Tuesday evening.  At that stage, it had been almost 4 days since my last orgasm.  I was pretty tense, pent up and almost an emotional wreck.  We hadn’t purposley planned on not playing for that long – I think he just had a few days where he was more tired than normal.  We had lots of slow, touching, kissing, licking, nibbling, cuddling foreplay, followed by me climbing on top of him and fucking him very slowly until we both came.  It was deeply satisfying.  We cuddled afterwards, our naked bodies pressed close for warmth.

We had another play session on Wednesday evening, an intensely passionate affair of rubbing and touching.  I used a tenga egg on him, he seemed to enjoy it, even though it popped off during the end when he was orgasm, I tried my best to compensate with my hand.  I think I succeeded for the most part.

Last night, we played games and watched some tv.  I don’t mind the days where we don’t have sex.  But sometimes it’s hard for me not to touch him, or strip him or pin him down and use him.  I feel like those things would be a breach of what we have – which is trust and respect.  I try my best to behave, but sometimes when he’s sitting there, lost in his own little world of spreadsheets and tea, I want to grab him and make him mine again.

I feel like we haven’t done anything terribly kinky in a while.  That’s partly due to it being winter and I don’t enjoy putting him in discomfort by making him stark naked on a freezing cold night and partly because it seems like he hasn’t really been all that interested lately in being tied up or pegged (i fucking hate that word) or dressed up, etc.  It might be lack of energy, but either way, I don’t like to push when it feels like I’m being unfair.   I understand that people aren’t always in the mood or don’t  have the energy„ etc.  At the same time, I feel like I don’t want to get into a routine of sex where we’re always doing the same thing or using the quickest method to “get off”.  Sex and exploring sex is something that I am really passionately enjoy and I’ve just felt like we’ve been a bit lazy recently.  When we planned on doing something like, having a dress up day or a green day, etc, it’s not happened.  We’ve just lazied around and not done it.

I hate summer, but perhaps sunshine and warmth will give us a bit more energy.

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Valentine’s Day Catchup

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So, let me tell you a little bit about Valentine’s Day. I haven’t written anything in ages – sometimes I just don’t get the urge to write and I figure it’s best waiting until I am in the right mood for it.

I left work a little earlier than usual and got a lift up to the city with two of my work colleagues, we picked my pet up along the way. We sat in the back holding hands as we grew closer to our destination. We got dropped off pretty close to the hotel and ambled over, checked in and headed up to the hotel room. At first, the keycard wouldn’t work on the door so he had to go downstairs and get another. We were up on the 11th floor. When we finally got into the room, we were first taken aback by how absolutely massive it was! Huge comfy bed, big flatscreen tv, bath and shower, really fancy decor and very fabulous. As you can imagine, the view over the city from the 11th floor was breathtaking.

We decided on getting a room service dinner and ordered one. While we were waiting, I went and had a really relaxing bath. The food took a while to arrive, and when it did it wasn’t exactly what I ordered and wasn’t the hottest, but it was tasty enough. We gobbled it down and watched a bit of TV while we were waiting on foods to go down. He had a shower and we got dressed up, went downstairs for a smoke and then into the cocktail bar for a drink. We had the most fabulous strawberry daqcuris, made with fresh strawberries and loads of crushed ice. It was like an orgasm in my mouth. We sat there chatting for an hour or so as we drank and it was just so nice to be out with me and him. We were a bit worried that he might get turned away from the fancy cocktail bar for wearing jeans but it turned out, a load of other people were there in jeans so it was grand. After drinks and smoke, we headed back up to the room.

My big surprise was pending and I got really excited. I went into the bathroom to change into the little outfit that I’d bought. It was a red and black satin chemise with a lace top. It looked pretty nice on. He went into the bathroom to change too and came out in the most gorgeous little pink dress with a frilly corset/petticoat and white stockings. He’d brought heels up too but the carpet was too thick to wear them. I couldn’t stop staring at him, he’d went to all this effort just for me and he looked like divine. I sat there for a while just taking in the little character that he’d created for me. This sweet, innocent, naughty little pet who wanted to be played with, who wanted to be tied up and teased and fucked. That wasn’t the end of the surprises though, he produced a brand new strapon for me with a much bigger jelly dildo than my previous one (which also came with a spare dildo) and also a set of vibrating nipple suction cups. I felt my body tingle and butterflies in my stomach. What did I do to deserve this perfect creature?

I lay down beside him and we kissed, my hands wandered over his body exploring every part of his new costume and the perfect little body underneath. He’d not been allowed to orgasm for two whole days. Two days that I’d spent teasing him and edging him and now here he was, once again, at my mercy. He had his chastity device on underneath his outfit still, he’d worn it for most of the day. I told him to go and take it off, and he did so. He came back with a grin on his face and lay down on the bed beside me again. I put him onto his knees so that I could take in the full view of his layers of frilly petticoat coupled with his perfect little ass. He was obedient, bending to every position I put him in. I slid my body underneath him and licked and sucked him for a little while. I could feel how heavy and achey he was, he’d been so well behaved and continued to be. He didn’t once complain or beg for release, he just lay there and took the teasing, the attention, my hands on him, my mouth on him. I tied him to one of the chairs. I licked and sucked him for a little bit and then positioned the chair beside the bed. I took the spare dildo, a big pink floppy jelly one, and fucked myself with it as he watched. I enjoyed the sensation of his eyes on me and his swollen cock leaked onto his leg. I had him gagged too so he was drooling on himself, it ran down his chin and all over his pretty dress. That just made me wetter, I could feel myself getting close to orgasm, so I stopped, knowing it would be harder to stop the closer I got.

I untied him and put him on the bed face down and bent over. I equipped my new strapon and lubed it up and slowly began fucking his ass. He squirmed around a lot, it was difficult to start – being quite significantly bigger than what he was used to, but we made a little bit of progress with it and we both enjoyed the experience.

I rolled him over onto his front and mounted him and began fucking him as slowly as I could manage. He squirmed and moaned like a pretty little whore and came very fast. I smiled down at him, knowing how hard it must have been for him to even hold out that long.

After that, I held him for a bit and he played with me. It didn’t take him long bringing me to orgasm and delicious it was. The rest of the evening was a hazy blur.

We were awoken at around 5am by a really loud banging. It kinda sounded like someone was banging on a metal tray with a hammer, right outside our bedroom door. We peered out into the corridor and it was completely empty. We took a while trying to figure out where the incessant banging was coming from. We called downstairs to reception but no one answered, and he ended up getting dressed and going down. It was literally so loud, that we couldn’t sleep. He came up 5-10 minutes later with another room card, telling me that they’d given us a new room to sleep in for the rest of the night – that it was a door on the roof banging in the wind and they couldn’t go up there to fix it because it was too dangerous. We got put into an even bigger room with a fancy bathroom, and also – it was a smoking room!! Bonus! We had a smoke and then went to sleep again.

When we woke up, we packed our stuff up between the two rooms and went downstairs to reception to pay. I had a bit of a complain at the lady who was going to take our money and she went and got the manager. The manager apologised profusely and told us that he wouldn’t be charing us for anything. That’s right, we got the entire evening for FREE!!!! The room service, dinner, cocktails, two bedrooms, the works! All free!

We left the hotel after an amazing evening with huge grins. We went and had breakfast in a nice cafe, did a little bit of shopping and came home. My first thought upon entering our home was “sure is nice to be back in the castle”. Of course it’s lovely to go and stay places and hang out somewhere different for a bit, but there’s no place I’d rather be than at home, in our “castle” (that’s what we call it) with my lovely partner and my silly old black one-eared cat.

Image Credits: 

Image #1 http://vyrhelle-vyrl.deviantart.com/

Image #2 http://anndr.deviantart.com/

Image #3 http://tincek-marincek.deviantart.com/

My Submissive – Q&A

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A few have you have sent in some questions over the past couple of months that I finally got around to asking my sub.  Here they are  together with his answers.

1. What first attracted you to femdom?

I found a book discarded by a bus stop when I was younger. Being quite the bookworm, I read it on the bus, and I guess the seeds of alternative lifestyles comes from there. That was my first experience with a lot of things, and I think is probably the root of some of my fetishes. The book was penny in harness by penny birch. The cover attracted me because of the latex, and I enjoyed the book. I’m not really into dressing like a horse, but I guess we all refine our tastes over time!

2. What kind of d/s experience do you have prior to your current relationship?

It just kind of creeps up on you I guess. As I get older I learn more about how I feel about stuff and what I like to do so it’s constantly evolving. I had a few experiences with older, more dominant women than I was used to, and enjoyed it a lot more than the girls around my age I dated when I was a teenager. I thought it was a maturity thing, but looking back I probably enjoyed it more due to the dynamic.

Confident, strong women are much more attractive for me. I guess I have always got a kick out of my partner being in charge, it just sits naturally with me. I had a few relationships when I was younger where, as the male I was expected to be the dominant half and there are a lot of situations I can recall where I was just uncomfortable or unsure or just thinking ‘this should be the other way around’. I still made a few wrong turns on that front, but it lead me to where I am today, and I wouldn’t change that for anything. Meeting my partner changed my life for the better in more ways than I could recap here.

3. What’s your favourite kind of play?

Fave play I flutter through different moods a lot, so it varies a lot. Generally though I’d say my favourite type of play is sensual, involving lots of teasing and intimacy. I like dressing up , it makes me feel more confident and attractive, and I like to feel involved. A middle ground between being someone’s toy and being a test subject.

4. What’s your favourite outfit?
I have two. One is my maid costume.. black pvc with wet-look stockings and opera gloves, with matching frilly fingerless gloves and hair tie. This will always be special for me because it was the first full outfit I put together for myself that I was fully happy with. The other is a red dress my partner got me. I think this just reminds me of how well she knows me. It’s so perfectly something that I love that it just blows me away. I have so many lovely clothes from her it’s honestly hard to pick a favourite! Other top ones would be the shimmery short dresses she got me, a gold dress that was super cheap and fabulous, and all my shoes . I love heels. A lot.
5. What are you like outside of your relationship, with other people – what kind of person are you?
A hard question to answer hehe. I like to think that I am a nice, easy going, easy to get along with, intelligent and occasionally witty. However, I also know im chronically lazy, prone to outbursts of long and wittery prose and/ or rambling speeches, and I find it terribly hard to pretend to take an interest in people’s children. I’m not rude, I just find it difficult to engage with people over stuff I have zero interest in. I’m also very good at putting things off! Whilst my bank balance probably appreciates it, given how many clothes sit in my eBay folder on my computer, the sometimes overflowing bin in our house rumbles with discontent. I also love cuddles, pokemon, computer games, books, films, scifi and music. I have such an eclectic taste in stuff.
I can listen to jazz and death metal in the same evening. I also do have a hefty streak of obsessive behavior. When I’m interested in stuff, I can really get into it. For recent examples, see my pokemon breeding spreadsheet, or my 12 weeks of sneaky research to give my partner a lovely valentines day! I guess in the bedroom I vary wildly from being hyper slutty to delicate and unsure of myself. No idea why, but I guess I just like to go with how I’m feeling.
6. What tips would you give to a submissive man wanting to find a dominant woman?  What pitfalls would you avoid?
Go out and do things you like. Go to meetups and keep your expectations realistic. You wouldn’t expect a woman you met in a bar to fall in love with you because you bought her a cocktail, it’s not different just because she’s wielding a cane. You’ll be more likely to meet someone you get on with if you’re doing stuff you like. If I met a woman at a Tory conference, we’re not gonna be compatible just because I thaught she looked good in a suit.
Pitfalls: Don’t lie or exaggerate yourself for an internet profile. People will see through you the second you meet them. Don’t go looking for just a domme.. People are complicated and everyone is different. No use hooking up with someone you find attractive only to realise that you don’t have anything
7. Can you picture yourself in a non-d/s relationship?
Probably not. It’s been my experience that aspects of the ds relationship fit so well with my personality that I’d end up being unhappy and missing those things. Not just sexually, but I couldn’t have a relationship with someone who didn’t understand my submissive side.
8. What’s your favourite toy?
I’d say that the magic wand is my favourite, just because of its versatility. Its fun whether I’m feeling slutty or delicate.
If you have any more questions for me or him, ask them here.

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Right on.

End of the darkness

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My pet spent most of the weekend feeling ill.  I spent most of the weekend looking after him.  He got tired easily and his chest/throat were very sore.  I fed him Beechams hot drinks, tea, sausages, strepsils and vitamins.  I held him, I bathed him, I watched tv with him when he grew too tired to play games.  There was a lot of improvement yesterday and I think he’s starting to feel a little better now, or at least, the worst of it’s over.

I always feel bad when he’s sick, because, although I look after him, I can’t help but get incredibly aroused at how weak he is and how easy it would be for me to take advantage of him, if I wanted to… Especially when he’s lying there, all weak, sick and flopped down on a chair wrapped in blankets, looking so vulnerable.  It drives me crazy.  I feel like my libido went into overdrive this weekend and I did my absolute best to suppress it.  Obviously, he wasn’t much in the mood, not being well and all… and I was trying to focus my energy on getting him better.  

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I distracted myself with housework and feeding and computer games and weed.  At one stage, I felt so overwhelmed that I just shut down and my body filled with bad chemicals.  I could feel myself getting saturated by them, a darkness seeping into me.  I felt like I was falling into a huge black pit.  There he was at the top, peering over the edge, calling my name, trying to pull me back out – even in his weakened state, he’ll never leave me there to fall prey to the black.  

I found myself on the sofa with him, once again, staring down at his beautiful body.  He was dressed in a long, silky blue nighty and his wet hair fell over his shoulders, his big blue subby eyes stared up at me and I melted.  I looked down and he’d grown hard.  His eyes told me to touch him and his body responded positively when I did.  I went downstairs and took a shower and we reunited in the bedroom.  We lay there facing each other, my hand on his neck supporting the back of his head.  He’s got a sensitive neck, I told him that.  He likes it when I run my fingers along it gently, he likes when I hold it, when I choke it and when I kiss it.  

I pulled him closer to me and stroked between his legs.  I told him to pass me the vibrator, and we shared it for a while.  I didn’t want to hold him too long, tire him out too much, he was close and he needed release before his short energy reserves ran out.   I sucked his cock and climbed on top of him and fucked him backwards.  We came. He looked like he needed it, almost as much as me.  The darkness subsided.

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Slow, lazy January evening.

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My poor little pet hasn’t been so well the last couple of days.  He’s got some kind of chesty throat thing.  I’ve been taking care of him as best I can, but I always feel kind of helpless when he’s ill.

Last night we watched a few movies together, had a smoke and ambled downstairs.  I was expecting another early night, in order to help get him over his infection, but he arrived into the room in the new leather dress I’d bought for him.  I was horny instantly.

He was crouching on the bed attempting to fix spotify on his Nexus so that we could listen to music.  This gave me full access to the glory that is his cute little ass.  It was exposed under the short leather dress, perfectly rounded and delicious. It looked good enough to eat.  I rubbed it a little, the sensitive parts, to gauge his reaction.  He moaned a little bit, I was distracting him from completing his task.  I pulled on his cock gently with the other hand and proceeded to rub his ass.  He was already hard and struggling to remain focused on the device in his hands.  

The music started and he signed with relief as he could now fully enjoy the pleasure being given to him.  His body looked amazing in the tight leather dress, I enjoyed the feeling of running my fingers over it.  I left him temporarily and told him to get comfortable.  I’d acquired a vibrating prostate stimulator and  a bottle of lube.  I toyed with his ass a little bit before inserting the toy. It slid in easily, he wanted to be filled up and used.  I fucked him gently with it at first, very gently, used it to bring him into that lovely euphoric state I like to keep him in for so many of our sessions together.

After a while of teasing, I switched the vibrator on.  I began fucking him as I used his cock with my other hand.  The feel of the leather against my wrist, the way his ass looked and the noises he was making indicated that he would soon cum.  He asked for permission to cum pretty quickly and thanked me when I granted it.  He came hard, very hard, a lot of cum and slumped on the bed.  He was exhausted.  I cleaned the bed up and got back in.

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We chatted for a while after that.  Both being quite stoned, about a wide variety of unrelated topics.  I love talking with him. A lot of his views are very similar to my own and he’s intelligent.  That’s one of the sexiest things about him.  His big, beautiful brain.  

I was soaking from before, when I felt his little hand edging it’s way downward, I smiled and rolled over onto my back and removed my panties.  I was expecting a short playtime, mainly because, he’s still quite sick and he was probably tired after his own, but I was mistaken.  He toyed with me for quite a long time, and I really enjoyed it. A lot of the time, I can’t handle being teased much, particularly after not orgasming for several days, but whatever it was he was doing, I wanted more of it.  I was enjoying the long, slow build up.  

I love watching him when he’s playing with me, I can see him concentrating on his task but also getting aroused, which arouses me even more.  I love the way he makes me feel.  When I did cum, it almost made me pass out…. It was the most intense orgasm I’ve had so far, in my whole life, to date.  I say “to date” because he’s only ever gotten better over the past year.  It never feels the same, he’s always trying new things and touching me in different ways… it was absolute heaven though.  I lay there unmoving for a good 10 minutes, or what felt like an eternity. I felt truly and utterly spent, satisfied and elated.

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(pic source: http://www.deviantart.com/art/here-hair-everywhere-391560440)

 

What makes a male cross dresser attractive for women?

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I’m thinking of my own partner here, and I guess, for me it’s his gentleness, feminine ways and movement, softness of skin, the way his gorgeous long hair falls over his shoulders, the way he smiles at me – a really sweet smile. I call him my little lesbian, because he absolutely is, even when I let him be on top, the way he moves his body, the sounds he make – he’s so much better at femininity than me sometimes, haha 🙂

My partner has a beard, a hairy chest, hairy legs… like, I guess if you looked at him in his normal man-clothes, you wouldn’t ever think that he’s at all feminine. But when he’s with me, and we have our doors locked and our curtains drawn, he’s my little lesbian princess.

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